Agape

In two of my books (Healing the Culture and The Spirit of Leadership), I describe the four levels of happiness in detail. “Happiness” may be defined as the fulfillment of a desire (and “unhappiness” as the non-fulfillment of desire). Thus, if there are four kinds of desire, there will also be four kinds of happiness. Normally, one of these desires (and its satisfaction – “happiness”) becomes dominant and the others become either recessive or ignored. The dominant desire becomes our identity, while recessive ones serve the dominant one. Ignored desires generally frustrate or debilitate us. Even though all four desires are functional, the dominant desire (or identity) tends to control the way we view happiness and success, our goals in life, the way we conduct relationships and view love, our principles and ethics, the ideals we seek, and the way we judge our self-worth, our progress in life, and our very selves. Needless to say, the kind of desire we choose or allow to become dominant is one of the most important decisions in our lives. Therefore, a more systematic explanation of these desires might be helpful to better understand the fourth level (the transcendent, faith, and/or spiritual life).

Level 1 (laetus) is the desire for externally stimulated or physical pleasures and possessions (e.g., a bowl of linguini or a new Mercedes e-Class with leather upholstery).

Level 2 (felix) is an ego-gratification arising out of the displacement of the outer world toward my inner world (my ego – “I”). Such ego-gratifications might take the form of increases in status, admiration, achievement, power, control, winning, etc., and generally entail a comparative advantage, which can lead to fixation and extremely negative emotive conditions (see below).

Level 3 (beatus) moves in the opposite direction of Level 2. Instead of displacing the outer world toward my inner world (Level 2), it invests my inner world in the outer world, that is, it tries to make an optimal positive difference to the world (e.g., to family, friends, organization, community, church, culture, and kingdom of God) with my time, talents, energy, indeed, my life. It can occur through both action and “being with,” and occurs most powerfully through agape (love without expectation of return – love for the sake of the beloved alone).

Level 4 (sublimis) is the desire for the ultimate, unconditional, or perfect in truth, love, goodness, beauty, and being. Faith identifies perfect and unconditional truth, love, goodness, beauty, and being with God; and so Level 4, for people of faith, is the desire for God. Its fullest expression has been elucidated throughout this book.

As one moves up the four levels of desire, one attains more pervasive, enduring, and deep purpose in life. For example, Level 3 or 4 purpose has a much greater effect in the world (more pervasive) than a Level 1 or 2 purpose (which is restricted to self-benefit). Similarly, Level 3 and 4 purpose endures much longer than Level 1 or 2 purpose. Level 4 purpose even endures unto eternity. Finally, Level 3 or 4 purpose is deeper (utilizes our higher powers of creativity, intellection, moral reasoning, love, and spiritual awareness) than Level 1 or 2 purpose. If efficacy in life is determined by the pervasiveness, endurance, and depth of one’s actions, then the higher one moves up the levels of desire, the greater the effectiveness of one’s life.

The only “down side” to this ascendancy of effectiveness and purpose in life is that one has to delay gratification, look beneath and beyond the surface of life, and give up some degree of intensity. It is clear that Level 1 is immediately gratifying, surface apparent, and intense; while Level 4 frequently requires nuance, education, subtlety, delay in gratification, and detachment from intensity. Thus, the spiritual life is marked by a trade-off – in order to attain to universal and eternal effects arising out of our self-transcendent powers of truth, love, goodness, beauty, and being, we frequently have to give up some degree of immediate gratification, intensity, and surface apparentness.

This “trade-off” marks one of the most difficult challenges of the spiritual life, for it is not easy to let go of what is so easily and intensely satisfying. Yet, it is worth it, for the move to Levels 3 and 4 fills us with higher purpose, more enduring (even eternal) effects, and awakens the highest, most sophisticated powers within us; and far more than this, Level 4 introduces us to a deep relationship with the unconditionally loving God. Level 4 simultaneously actualizes our humanity and spiritual life. Saint Augustine phrased it well when he prayed to God, “For Thou hast made us for Thyself, and our hearts are restless until they rest in Thee.”

As noted above, each level of desire can become dominant, and when it does, it becomes our purpose in life and our identity. As shown throughout the book, human beings can only be ultimately satisfied by a Level 4 identity, because our desire for the unconditional and perfect in truth, love, goodness, beauty, and being can never be satiated by what is conditioned or imperfect. Inasmuch as God is the one and only unconditional and perfect Truth-Love-Goodness-Beauty-Being, then Saint Augustine was correct in his prayer.